Did you know... ?



Did you know that the Bible is magic? All you have to do is read it and people will be saved.
Did you know that there is a difference between teaching the bible and biblical teaching?
Did you know that if I sin, it's your fault because you weren't praying hard enough for me?
Did you know that there is only one way to do church? God's way (er.. my way)
Did you know that you can tell when God leaves a church? It has to do with "manifestations".
Did you know that fullfilling biblical community means that a youth pastors wife must serve in the student ministry?
Did you know that "doing life together" means that a youth pastor and his family have no boundaries and are available to the congregations every whim?
Did you know that "telling the truth in love" is code for " instead of working through Matt 18, I'm going to tell everyone but the person I have a problem with my issues?
Did you know that in order to study the bible you must worship God first?
Did you know that worship = singing songs that makes me feel something so I know God is working?
Did you know that passive aggressive behavior in the church is ok, as long as you worship together first, and say it in a nice way?
Did you know that "being heard" means "doing what I want"?
Did you know that "we want leadership" is code for "do it the way we used to"?
Did you know that the best way to fire someone is to tell them "God told me to"?
Did you know that's the best way to get away with anything?
Did you know that intolerance is a spiritual gift?
Did you know that God is a loving God who is as intolerant as I am?
Did you know that Rated R movies are evil?
Did you know that we are called to seperate ourselves from the world and culture as much as possible?
Did you know that spirituality and emotionalism are the same thing?
Did you know that i must quote a verse every time I speak in a church meeting, even if it's just to plan on who's going to buy the coffee or I'm not spiritual?
Did you know that my view of the Bible is infallable?
Did you know that philosphy is evil and so is post modernism?
did you know that church as we know it has not been influenced by culture or philosphy, including my view of the bible, spiritual gifts, Jesus, and my view of truth?
Did you know that it's completely ok to stop thinking once you become a christian?
Did you know that the church has a lot to learn from business?
did you know that faith makes sense?
did you know that certainty is absolute and those that don't have it are less faithful?
did you know that..... i think i'll stop now.

posted by riddle at 6:42 PM | |